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Deacon-structing Vocations: The Single Life

November 22, 2014
If there is anything that we learn from reading Scripture is that God calls people. Consistently, every story in the bible, involves a call: Abraham, Moses, Noah, Gideon, Jonah, Samuel, Ruth, Esther, Mary, Paul. Everyone gets called.
God may not 'call' us the way He called Moses or St. Paul, or the specific way that Jesus called his disciples, but the bottom line is that no matter what, God will not ask you to do something that you are not capable of doing.
The last couple of weeks we've been looking at 'The Call' and 'Discernment'; that is, the process of prayerfully making a decision according to God's plan.
God calls everyone to holiness. That means that all of us are created for Heaven. That's our final destination. Our Vocation is the best way that each one of us, individually can respond to God's call to holiness.
Catholics can consider the following vocations: single life, married life, religious life and ordained life. Each one is a special and unique way in which we can know, love and serve God and work towards holiness. God can call us to any job or career, based on the gifts we have, what we are good at doing and what we like to do, but the best way that we can become holy, which is what really matters in life, is by one of these four ways of relating to God and to those around us.
The Single Life
The single life is probably the most misunderstood vocation and the one that gets the least attention. Part of this is due to the fact that all of us are single at some point in our life and so being single feels like a transitional stage. But being single is different than living the 'Single Life'.  Living the Single Life doesn't mean you're waiting to get married or can't find a girlfriend. It doesn't mean you're not sure if you want to be a priest or a sister or brother. The Single Life means that you are committed to a life that's full of serving others and God, with lots of energy, because there is lots to do.
There is a lot of pressure in our culture to be married, but not everyone is called to be married, nor should everyone be married. Not everyone is called to be a parent and many people who don't have a desire for marriage or parenting feel that this must mean that they are called to the religious or ordained life. But that may not be the case. If you feel that this is not where you want to be, maybe that is an indication that you are called to the Single Life.
People who live the Single Life have a different disposition towards others. If someone asks me whether I can help them, say on a Friday night, I have to check with my wife. I have to see what my kids are doing. Even people in the Ordained or Religious Lives have specific commitments to their religious communities and are accountable to their superior or their Bishop. But a single person can drop everything and go. They do not have the same family commitments that married people have. This can be a great gift to others. This is why people living the Single Life spend a lot of their time involved in volunteer activities in the Church and in the community.
We learn that in married life we best live out the love that God has for us, a love that is free, faithful, fruitful and total. But this type of Christ-like love is lived in every Vocation. People living the Single Life are able to live a direct reflection of this love in a very specific way with a freedom that is not found in the other three Vocations.
Ultimately it has to do with holiness (read Pope Francis‚ General Audience - Wednesday, November 19). As in all Vocations, if you are called to the Single Life, that means that this is the best way in which God is calling you, personally to respond to his call to holiness. This means that the Single Life is the best way for you to be holy. It is possible that for some, this may be a stage in life and it is possible that you do not choose the Single Life but rather, your circumstances determine that this is your state in life.
Still, even if it is not your first choice to be single, you can have a rich and fulfilling life, serving Christ and others. No matter how you end up there you will find that you are free to do this because you are single. Single people can give all of themselves to God without reserve or distractions.
Next week, let's look at the Religious Life.
Photo credit: CNS photo/Sarah Webb, CatholicPhilly.com
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